A recollection
of the
Up
for this year’s trip to the Smoke were:
Yupmeister,
Mid Week Tone, Pedro, Richee-Lionel, Granpop Bill, JayCee, Dasher, Craigee
50/50, Sid - Stevey 60/40 Phone a friend, DCeen, McCeen, Utterly who had taken time off in between a hectic
programme of interviews to join us, Bolt from the blue (Downsize Dave?) Ax /
Keithee's
up for it, Jacko, and Huge caught a separate train
from Crewe, and likewise Matt Silver Bear, Sean of the Dead and Dean Sargeant (still mulling over a nickname) took the train
from
A
fine mesh (Harmesh) was in a fine mess at home plugging
a leaking roof and sadly had to dib out.
On Stoke platform the train tickets were handed out,
much to the relief of Dasher and Richee, who had been
having panic attacks all morning, recalling how they’d mislaid their tickets
the previous year. A map of the toilets
in
The
train from Stoke left promptly at 10.50am, with everyone present and
correct. After much hesitancy, an hour
and a quarter into the journey, we decided to have a coffee. The sachets of milk were handed to a certain
person, who I won’t mention (JayCee), who rubbed his
end too hard and shot the milk and chocolate over his crotch. It’s as well we’re used to seeing his
stains.
Most had their A4 maps of
We met up with the rest of the clan as we entered
the concourse and set off down to the underground where we queued for some time
collecting oysters. Impatiently, several
took off and waved from the train as the rest saw the train doors slam shut in
front of them. Good start.
Through the Borough Market we arrived at the Market
Porter, our favourite starter. The sun
wasn’t shining on us today, which is unusual. I must be losing my touch. Still,
it was mild and rain wasn’t due till later, so we could muster outside.
Winkle Picker and
Across the river, we found the Black Fryer, where
Craigee felt at home settling into a cosy corner.
DCeen and McCeen bagged
some crisps, and Pedro nipped to relieve himself, prompting a failed attempt to
leave him behind, as he was too quick this time.
Scottee was keen to settle up
for his train ticket but couldn’t find a cash machine. He declared there’d be drinks all round if he
could find one. He was so excited when
he finally found one, that he missed Dasher sneaking up from the rear to nick
his cash.
We sauntered along Fleet Street and eventually the Edgar
Wallace, our next destination, was spotted by MW Tone. The landlord couldn’t believe his luck and
began setting up more pumps ready for more orders. He wet his pants when he spotted JayCee with 2 pints in his hands, not realising that JayCee was also wetting his.
The rain pelted down as we followed the north bank of
the
During a cap wearing session, Bolt took a shine to the
beer mats which were shaped like jigsaw pieces.
‘Got any bits youth to fit this?’ he asked in PC speak, just as Scottie
followed the tradition of throwing beer over Craigee and the table and soaking Bolt’s
puzzle. Craigee then spent several
minutes under the hand drier trying to dry out his clothes. Bolt gave up with his bits.
Back in the rain we eventually found the Porterhouse
just below
Helen miraculously met us at the Indian after her phone
battery had earlier ran out. The Masala Zone Indian
had been booked for 6pm which gave us plenty of spare time to catch our trains later
from Euston. The food was bought out on
large silver trays, with the food shrinking into oblivion in the middle. ‘When’s the main course
coming youth?’, Craigee asked, as he finished off Scottee’s left overs in seconds.
Still raining we descended the steps into the
underground and were soon on the concourse again at Euston. Utterly received a call and slipped off
unnoticed to catch an earlier train. The
Creweites caught their train and the Stokees located the The Bree
Louise in
On
the journey back we were entertained superbly led by Bolt, Craigee, Richee and Scottee with the volume
level increasing minute by minute, emphasised more so as we were sitting in a
‘Quiet Zone’.
The
chatter began something like this:
Bolt
commented that he was currently reformatting a hard drive. Craig responded saying, ‘I remember when a
hard drive was when we drove from Stoke to
And continued with:
‘Did
you hear about the increase in the price of cork now it’s been floated on the
market?’ ‘Where’s it come from?’ ‘You’re
barking up the wrong tree youth!’. ‘Its value is so high, when did you last see
one in a wine bottle?’ It’s a buoyant
market’. ‘
‘Dear
Jim, can you arrange it for me to visit a cork mine?’ ‘Now then, now then, how’s
about that then.’ ‘Dear Jim, can
you arrange it for me to have a shell suit made out of cork? Rattle, rattle.’ ‘
Tremendous
entertainment and a fitting end to the day.
Yupmester
(Enjoy
yer baltis)
PS
The route taken is shown below along with proposals for the next 2 years !! - sorted.
