SQUARRITES RAIL ALE TRAIL – DEWSBURY TO
On track were
Yupmeister,
Mid Week Tone, Pedro, Richee-Lionel, Granpop Bill, JayCee, Dasher, Craigee
50/50, DCeen, Spikelett, Fire Fighter Ax / Wilton (Chris Rushton), Mr
Tahoohigh, Utterly, Beardee, Silver Bear, A Mesh, Keithee's up for
it, Jacko, Sean of the Dead, Deano, Mothy, Corky and Tie-man Kev.
3 months of
planning and we were well chuffed to be on our first squarry rail ale trip. On the run in to the trip, the Yupmeister had
been taking in the sights of
We stood on
the platform at Stoke watching a hundred or so virgin workers in orange
overalls shovelled stone around between train tracks. Our north bound line was clear and the train
was on time. But where was Dasher and
Tie-man Kev? A mobile rang, ‘I conna
find me tickets youth’. ‘Dunna worry Dash,
there’s a spare set here youth’, answered Yup.
It was still under control as usual.
The
train left Stoke at 10.25am,
arriving in
On the
train, the excitement grew and the laughter rose as recollections of Chris’s
taxi ride and his excessive fare of £400 from
Jacko jumped
aboard at Mac and ten minutes later we arrived at Manchester Piccadilly to meet
up with Keithee’s up for it, Corky, Sean of the Dead and Mothy. Sadly there was still no Tie-man Kev and
despite attempts we couldn’t contact him.
In desperation we turned to a pasties and pies shop, in the hope that
he’d turn up. In our haste we cursed as
we missed an advert ‘buy 4 and get one free’.
We didn’t miss our train though which had sneakily arrived and was
sitting beyond another train down the platform.
Aha, thought they’d catch us out eh!!’
Our
train left
DEWSBURY
There was to be only one stop at Dewsbury which was the West Riding pub sitting
directly on the platform. Goats milk was the flavour of the day, being
just one of around 10 available ales. A hugemongous
fish’n’chip meal presented to one of the customers looked very appealing
although time was short. With tears in
his eyes a starving Mothy cried, ‘what she left on her plate would have done me
for a week’.
It had to
be a day of strict timekeeping and there was no Spike to call up the troops
with his deafening whistle. Still, word
got around that our train was due in ten minutes. Jaycee quickly knocked back his pint (well, sipped)
as he saw a train arriving, and then cursed at his watch for having small
fingers. Ours was to be the following train. ‘I need one with biguns‘, he muttered.
‘Don’t we
all’ cried the crowd assembled on the platform.
Our
train left at 13:06
although others were available at 13:36, 14:06, 14:36, or 15:06 (9 minute
journey)
On the
train Graham confessed to having a ‘stiffie’ which we were later relieved to discover
was in his neck. It impressed some folk
on the train though.
Hopping onto the Huddersfield
platform, the first off headed immediately towards the Head of Steam until they
were restrained by Yup and herded back towards our proposed destination, the Kings
Head pub, situated just outside the station. Goats milk was available
again with several others too many to remember.
‘Instead of
remembering the beers, perhaps we should just count the no of pumps instead’, suggested
MidweekTone. Here there were 10 pumps; 7
beers and 3 ciders. It sounded risky but
worth a go, however, by the third station we’d lost count of pubs let alone
pumps.
Tie-man Kev appeared out of the blue, having missed out amazingly
on only one of the stations. So, we
stopped for another before setting off across
It only took
around 15 minutes to get to the Rat although even that seemed a bit too far for
some. The Rat had 15 hand pulls of which
12 were on including ciders. The pub was
bought by Ossett Brewery in 2005 and evidently their ales were available, but I
can’t remember. Craigee found a welcome
snug and admired the décor, although he moaned a teeny weenie bit about the
warm beer. In hindsight maybe not a pub
I’d recommend to make an effort to visit to, although it’s selection of ales
were splendid.
They also
had a few games available, including chess.
A challenge began in a corner with black and white pieces moving faster
than Jaycee’s ale. Dasher cleverly swept
Pedro’s king off the table but somehow came off worse with a bloody nose.
Hunger pangs
were beginning to creep in as we headed back to the station, through the Head
of Steam, without stopping, and on to the platform; much to the annoyance and
protests of a grumpy landlady.
Craigee
slipped off to the gents, heralding the first derailment of the afternoon. Meanwhile, Tieman Kev realised our next train
was parked up and ready to roll on the opposite platform. Chuffinell.
Without so much as a ‘hows yer balti?’ we dashed across the bridge and
jumped aboard, leaving Craigee and several other slowcoaches behind consisting
of Richee, Craigee, Mothy, Firefighter Taxi, Corky, Sean of the dead and Mid
week Tone. Firefighter Taxi suggested hailing
a taxi to catch up, but a wiser and cheaper option to try out the Head of Steam
and catch a fast train to Stalybridge was quickly taken.
Our
train left at 15:30
although others were available at 14:30, 16:30, 16:59 (39mins), or 17:30 (21
minute journey)
The Railway Inn just across
the road from the station was the best ever pub of the trip (but don’t tell
Midweek Tone), with guest beers including Copper Dragon’s Golden Pippin amongst
others. Dasher opted for an old Peculiar
with a dash of course; considered even more peculiar by the barman.
A tray full
of pork pies soon disappeared. The mean
‘Tut, tut’ she shouted, ‘do you do that at home?’ (note –
she didn’t call him a young man). Bill
couldn’t believe the audacity of the woman and remarked how rude she was. A photo of the boots was taken, which could
enter next year’s calendar, to prove he hadn’t rested them on the stool. ‘
muttered JayCee. Reminding
him of home, Granpop Bill turned to his phone and texted, ‘hello darling, ow
are you?’ Back came the reply ‘I’ve just
clouted a wasp’s nest and the council have improved the give way lines at the
end of the road.’ Well there we go;
sounds like she was ok !
Our
train left at 16:51
although others were available at 15:51, 17:51, 17:52 (38mins), or 18:51 (9
minute journey)
STALYBRIDGE
We were
back on track, meeting up with the slowcoaches who had arrived at the Victorian
‘Station’ ahead of us courtesy of a fast train.
It was like stepping back in time with displays of photographs and
memorabilia from the past, dating back to 1885.
An old fashioned snack of homemade pie and black peas was devoured by a
starving Midweek Tone. There was an
excellent range of ales with a note stating that there had been over 7,000
different ones served to date. I
couldn’t remember how many thousand we had, and which ones, and I’d be surprised
if anyone else could either, but they must have been good.
Finally it
was time to move to
Leaving at 17:01 17:18 17:44 18:01 18:18
Arriving
at 17:22 17:37 18:09 18:20 18:37
Arr. Station MCV MAN MCO MCV MAN
(MCV
MAN Piccadilly
We were well looked after at Akbars, as far as we
remember. We were agog when Dean admitted
to having had a mouthful of someone’s, although Tim confirmed he’d been there
before. What were they talking about?
We said our
goodbyes to Tie-man Kev, A Mesh and Utterly before continuing a pleasant stroll
back to Piccadilly station, via
The last
train was at 21.15, arriving back in Stoke at 21.51. Our training was complete and we had gained
our CPD (Curry Proficiency Diplomas).
Another
next year??
Yupmeister
(enoy yer
baltis)
Another photo of the lads
leaving the best ever pub:
